Release The Baggage

"...let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us."  

(Hebrews 12:1)

There's a show I used to watch on A&E called Hoarders. The show depicts people who are chronic packrats. They pack so much stuff into their homes that it crowds them out and they can barely even maneuver through their own house. They find themselves surrounded and closed in by mounds of stuff that they’ve collected and allowed to accumulate over the years, so much so, that many of their homes are deemed uninhabitable or a hazard to not only themselves, but those around them.

So many of us women are exactly like the people I’ve seen on Hoarders. The only difference is that instead of hoarding physical stuff, we are emotional hoarders. Instead of our houses overflowing with loads of trinkets, trash and treasures, our hearts are packed to capacity with unforgiveness, painful secrets, insecurities, fear, memories from the past, envy and the like. And because our heart and mind are so severely cluttered, we leave little to no room for the Holy Spirit to fully dwell within us. So often we feel like “God, where are you? I can’t feel you. I can’t sense your presence.” And I can imagine Him standing just outside the doors of our heart, saying “I’m right here, but there’s no room in there for me. Your space is uninhabitable.”

Just like those people on the show, their massive accumulation of stuff draws a wedge between them and their loved ones, our internal baggage can build distance between us and the presence and power of God in our lives.

In just about every instance, the person who hoards is weighed down, unhappy or depressed, and their true progress in life is significantly hindered, if not completely stalled.

My favorite part of the show, though, is when psychologists and professional organizers come in and assist the individual with cleaning out their home, both internally and externally. Room by room, they walk side by side with the person, helping them to acknowledge their issue, identity the root of it, go through the things they’ve accumulated and then finally decide to let most, if not all, of it go. The transformation is nothing short of amazing.

They begin to smile again, laugh again, love again, their families are restored, their vitality is renewed, and their home that was once extremely cluttered and difficult to maneuver through, becomes a place where joy flows freely.

It’s very similar in life. When we open our emotional suitcase, sort through the things we’ve packed inside, and throw out those things that weigh us down, we are able to excel and thrive in life. When we drop the weight, clean out our heart, we can tread through life feeling much lighter. The help we need to do this is available to us through the Holy Spirit.

There is another thing that intrigues me about the people I see on Hoarders. Anytime a neighbor, co-worker, or anyone who lives outside of their home is asked about the person’s hoarding, their responses are almost always the same --“I had no idea.” Though they see these people probably on a day-to-day basis, from the outside, they look perfectly normal. That is because they have mastered the art of hiding what’s really going on behind their closed doors. The same is to true with so many women, especially in the church world. We are professional pretenders. We put on our Sunday Best, our Mac makeup, get our weave sewn in just right, slip on our 5 inch heels, flash our pearly whites, and we cover up the brokenness, bitterness, and battered hearts behind it. We cry ourselves to sleep at night, but come Sunday morning, we act as if we are filled with joy. We fall time and time again into the bed of the wrong man, searching for love and validation, but convince others that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. We burn with envy at our sister, inwardly rolling our eyes every time she walks by, but are quick to hug her with a “Hey girl!” and a smile.

We are masters at masquerade. We wear the masks and hide the weight so well that nobody has not even a clue about what’s really going on inside. But there is one truth that we can all be certain of – What’s in us eventually comes out. What goes on within our heart and mind eventually reveals itself through our outward actions. Weight cannot be forever hidden, and we absolutely cannot continue to pretend that we are spiritually fit, when internally, we are emotionally obese. The time is now to be honest with ourselves, recognize that our inward scale is tipping over, and choose to take proactive steps to lay aside those weights that hinder us from becoming all that God has destined us to be.

So, to begin this emotional fitness goal, I have five questions for you:

1. Who/What are the weights in your bag?
2. Why are you carrying it around?
3. Where has holding on to the weight(s) gotten you?
4. How do you drop the weight?
5. Once you empty your bag, what do you refill it with?

• Who/What are the weights in your bag (heart/mind)?

Identifying where the extra weight came from is the first step. I have personally embarked on a new journey to physical health and fitness after realizing that I’ve put on a few pounds over the past year. Before I could commence on working to lose the weight, I first had to ask myself “How did I accumulate this weight? What have I been putting into my body to cause this extra heaviness?” And those are the same questions you have to ask yourself. What or WHO is it that’s weighing me down?

> Insecurity (low self-esteem)

> Fear - God has not given us a spirit of fear…2 Timothy 1:7

> Depression - Heaviness in the heart of man maketh it stoop…Prov 12:25

> Unforgiveness - Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and waiting on the other person to die. It steals your joy, your peace, your sleep, and it breeds hatred, bitterness and strife.

> Other people’s problems - If helping others hurts you more, it is a weight and hindrance to your progress in life.

> Your past - If any man be in Christ he is a new creature. Old things have passed away, behold ALL things are become new (2 Corinthians 5:17). The past is a chain that holds you hostage. It weighs upon you, keeping you bound and preventing you from moving forward. In Christ, you are free indeed (John 8:36). Forget the former things. Follow Paul’s example in Philippians 3:13 and forget those things that are behind you.

< Lack of faith - An inability to trust in God is a breeding ground for worry, anxiety, and stress.

> Wrong relationships - "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil?” (2 Corinthians 6:14-15) Not that anyone is the devil, but sometimes we try to force a fit when it’s the wrong shoe altogether. Be mindful of the connections you make. Not everyone is traveling in the same direction as you.

•  Why are you carrying it around?

Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pains we bear. Jesus already carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders. We don’t have to. Yes, we all have our own cross to carry, but even in that, the burdens God gives are light. So why do we, day after day, lug around unnecessary weight? I find that the answer to that question is quite simple – we are comfortable with being uncomfortable. We’re “used to it” and confuse contentment with comfort. It makes me think about how the children of Israel, although they were being held back and in bondage in Egypt, they’d become so accustomed to their discomfort that they struggled with actually being delivered.

So many of us can be just like that. We simply get used to the weight, and we’ve learned so well how to dress it up and make it work, that we become oblivious to, or afraid of, the fact that we need to be made free. We carry it because we’ve made it a part of who we are, we are fearful of how life will be without it, and apprehensive about doing the actual work necessary to drop the weight. We carry it because it’s easier than letting go.

• Where has carrying it gotten you?

If your internal bag is filled with excess baggage, how much has it hindered you from being where you desire to be in life? Ask yourself, how much has holding on to No Good Joe delayed my process to being captured by Mr. Right? How have my insecurities prevented me from pursuing my educational, business, or career goals? How has the bitterness I have towards my absent father, abusive mother or ex-lover held me back from being open to receive love? How has solving everybody else’s problems drained me so that I’m unable to tackle my own? How has your internal baggage, your issues and hangups, kept you from advancing and growing in Christ? Extra weight slows you down, and I think if you’re honest, it’s safe to say that holding on to it has not gotten you very far.

•  How do you drop the weight?

You know, I’m so glad you asked! It takes exercise. Faith without works is dead, right? 1 Peter 5:7 says this, “Cast your cares (your burdens, your worries, your problems, your insecurities, your issues, the weight) upon the Lord. How do you cast your cares upon Him? You take every single thing to Him in prayer, you lay it at His feet, and you leave it there. It sounds easy, but trust me, I’ve had my own personal experiences with trying to drop emotional weight (unforgiveness, pornography, depression, fornication, fear, alcohol...), and I understand that it can seem quite difficult. But on my journey to emotional health, I learned this one thing – “this kind goes not out but by prayer and fasting.”

Sometimes you just have to turn your plate down, turn the tv off, log out of social media, turn your cell phone off, and get on your face before the Lord. The thing I love about God is He understands and we can be totally honest with Him. Tell him, Lord this is too heavy for me but I’m struggling to let it go. I know it’s hindering my progress in life and I wanna let it go, but I need your help. Help me to strip off this weight and leave it with you.

Then, there are times when we already know what we need to do to drop the weight, and crying before the Lord is not necessary. We already know we need to put Joe out of our house. We already know we need to stop gossiping on the phone with Sis. So & So. We already know we need to forgive our sister or brother and let go of the grudge. But in any case, we still need the Lord’s help.

We must consistently pray to be transformed by the renewing of our mind and learn to retrain and redirect our way of thinking. Sometimes our weight can just be stinky thinking…the woe is me mentality. But Philippians 2:5 says “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus.” And Philippians 4:8 tells us to think on those things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, and are of a good report.”

•  Once you empty your internal bag, what do you fill it with?

The answer to this is quite simple and can be found in Galatians 5:22-23 – “But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” We can never overfill on these.

Along this journey of life, because it is an uphill journey, it is imperative that we pack light. The enemy wants nothing more than to see you stuck in life, never reaching your full potential in Christ. But God is saying, I want to take you higher, but you’ve got to drop those weights that hold you down. His arms are outstretched saying, "Just give them to me. Give me your hurt, give me your pain, give me your insecurities, let go of that bitterness, give me that struggle, that secret addiction. Let me lighten your load so that you can run the race I’ve set before you."

Drop your weight as His feet.

From my heart to yours...

xoxo